A Pinterest Win!

I do things from Pinterest sometimes. Then I forget which specific one I did, or just how good/bad they were.
So for a long time I have been meaning to put them here, (at least some of them) and say how they really were, because my memory is complete crap. And now I am doing it, from my kitchen, while I clean and cook more food. So this will take a long time to write. At least for me. You, dear reader, will not notice a difference.

Chocolate Zucchini Brownies

I did make a couple changes to the recipe. One, I did a mix of chocolate chips, including some dark ones. Honestly, I probably could have used not as much as the recipe said. There was plenty enough sweetness to go around. Two, I used a gluten free flour mix from Bob's Red Mill, because I can't have gluten. It was my first time using it, but it worked just fine. Better than fine, because the husbear said he couldn't taste that it was gluten free.
This recipe is awesome, and will probably become one of my go-to treats. It has a ton of zucchini in it (2 cups) and no oil (it uses applesauce instead). I was really worried, because I have been taken in by promises of tastiness in healthier treats before, only to feel cheated and like I wasted time and expensive ingredients. But this one really lives up to it! I cannot express how happy this made me. Probably too much, but meh. I deserve to get excited about things sometimes.
In short, do this one.

Okay, NOW I'm HOPEFULLY Coming Back from the Dead for Real

Okay.  This summer has been so horrible and I hope that along with the season, all the things that have been going on leave.  In addition to the other stuff I already talked about, I had a really bad wart that needed a few laser treatments to remove it, but I had a bad reaction to the laser every time. Which resulted in a horribly bad and deep blood blister, so I couldn't walk for about a week each time.  I had another bout of sinusitis that spread to my eye, ear, and throat.  I also had some colds, more issues with my lady bits, and problems with a couple organs.  The latest thing is pretty much my fault, but still sucks.  I went to the Renaissance Festival wearing some shoes that looked great, but hurt my feet... really bad.  I did eventually switch to tennis shoes, but it was too late.  Both of my big toes turned purple, I had to get some meds (which caused yet another lady bit issue) and had parts of both nails removed.  Healing has been a long process, hindered by yet another cold.  Yay for me.

On a more cheerful note, I've been doing some glass fusing, experimenting with stuff... that mostly isn't turning out, but hey, live and learn.  I am also knitting, which is soothing since I haven't been able to spin when I have feet issues, though I did just have to frog a big secret project.  My sister in law had her baby, which is the most adorable baby in the entire universe.  I've gotten to visit her a few times, and even watched her once!  Hopefully I will get to see her again soon, but ever since she went back to work they've been busy.  Andy is her godfather :) which kinda makes me like a step-godmother sorta.  I'm the one who has time to plan things for her and stuff :P I knit her a couple pairs of socks and a blankie (that I of course forgot to take pictures of).  And I might or might not be working on some other things *shifty eyes*.

Tonight I'm going out for the first time in a while.  One of my friends is in a band that is part of a charity concert SlutWalk Benefit Concert @Acadia which benefits slutwalkminneapolis.  Don't let the name scare you, check it out.  It's an awesome cause. It's at a bar/restaurant place so there will be seats and food.  Perfect for a nice night out that isn't too taxing, all for a good cause, and watch my friend perform!

Back From The Dead

For the last couple weeks, I've been plagued by sinusitis, an eye infection, an ear infection, two lady part problems, and now it seems the ear infections might be coming back, but aside from feeling incredibly weak and tired, four prescriptions later I'm doing okay.  Besides the ear pain.
Anyway, I've been too sick to even spin (I've been mostly sleeping) so I've missed out on most of the Tour de Fleece, which is really sad, because I missed out on a bunch of fun, and some contests.  Now I'm going to be too busy to finish it up, what with catching up on some essential cleaning (seriously, without me broken dishes stay on the floor* and garbage bags don't get replaced. NOTHING gets done, except dishes) and family.  And my puppy has an ear infection as well.  Lovely day it was today.  On the plus side, I finally had the energy to cook again, so I got some real food :)
I did start Skyrim... I haven't put too much time in, but so far it is awe-inspiring.  The graphics are just freaking amazing,  I like some of the new things they are incorporating, and the dungeons are less repetition, more fun (so far, because I guess I haven't done too many yet).  The only thing I want is the ability to hold more weight, but that's just me.  I'm a whore and OCD about picking up everything.  Everything.  And then selling it or collecting it.  In Oblivion I was a total drunk for potions so I could hold over 1400 pounds.  I <3 flax.  Anyway, I'm in love.  I've been actively avoiding spoilers, so please don't ruin it for me.
Wish us luck!

*okay, only one broken bowl

Health Stuff, AGAIN

My heart is in danger.  After mucho testing of my blood (a joy in and of itself) they have discovered that my cholesterol is all out of whack, as is my thyroid (again) and apparently I have a particle in my blood that tells them that my heart is going to become involved in the next ten years.  Despite the changes in my life I've already made, my bad genetics makes it so I have to start going even more crunchy in my diet.  I really need help with this.  The doctor suggested a stone mill to grind up my own stuff, and all that jazz, and other changes.
I wish I had a workout partner, as my last one is moving far, far away and is working as much as possible to get some money for her move and lack of employment until she manages to find a job out there. I have a kinect, Netflix, and an elliptical.  This means workout videos (although a lot of them are for pussies who don't want to sweat, but need an excuse for how emaciated their forms are) I found one mistress who hurts me so good.  Kinect games, mostly dance, and that can get pretty intense.  Like, scary intense.  I'm still scared of my zumba game for most of it. And my dear sweet elliptical that is awesome. So I have a variety of stuff to do, and my foot is basically healed up now.
We have some serious thinking to do, mainly about whether or not to move up the timetable for having a kid, because apparently certain things can be labeled for PCOS, and all I would have to pay for now that we're past the deductible is the meds which Sam's has for a small fee. So if we move up the timetable, we could save thousands of dollars, because there was a lot of medical stuff that happened this year so yeah, we made it past the magical threshold of the giant deductible.
I'm Rrnting while *slightly* drugged up from a MAJOR panic/anxiety attack so if it doesn't make sense just ask.  Plus I'm distracted by the insane amount of stress hives I've broken out in. And I have some sort of infection in my tear duct getting worse by the day.  I'm gonna call the Doc on monday.
Because of drugs, and tiredness, I might clarify later on stuff if anyone's interested in that stuff.

Me with knitting stuff in my hair that was put there by my husbear.

 

 Also kind of embodies how I feel.  A little loopy, crazy, but me all the same.

Oh Yeah, By The Way, I Adopted An Angora Rabbit.

I have a really good friend, blumzieluxuryyarns who breeds and raises angora rabbits.  She had this one chubby little satin angora bunny named Bunny who had infertility issues, just like a certain author that is writing these words right now.  She offered to give (!<3!) her to me, because she needs rabbits whose lady bits work right.
At first, when I brought her home, I wasn't sure it was going to work.  She got an insanely bad UTI that was made worse reeeaaaaly fast because of the stress of moving, so she ended up peeing blood.  Not good.  Plus when our puppy got near her she flipped out and scratched at his face and grunted at him.  I took her to my vet, who is so awesome, and sees all kinds of animals, like hamsters and bunnies, because he is tired of people treating them like disposable pets.  She got a shot (that she took like a BOSS) and got some nasty smelling meds that I had to force feed her with an infant syringe.  Little by little she got better, and we moved her into the garage on a pedestal, where she has her own space, but we bring her inside about every other day.
Bunny, now mostly known as Honey Bunny has calmed down a lot.  She flips out if she doesn't get food fast enough, which includes her throwing her food dish around, and anything else not secured to the wall, and a diva-like huff and a body move (that thing huffy prissy women do) fit for a movie starlet, lol.  She likes Teddy... in that she wants to hump him now.  Which with long claws hurts. Teddy keeps more of a distance now, unless she engages him in play in the living room. We gave her a blankie, and now she won't let anyone mess with it :D She uses it for cuddles, and to hide her treats, chewies, and toys.  We are now in the process of getting a custom hutch (bigger hole for her).  We also got her a chest harness and leash that she's getting used to.  With my new dosage of meds I was able to go outside in the backyard with both fuzzies for about ten minutes. I consider this a big win.  I love my new dosage.

Introducing: Honey Bunny!

 Just chillin' in the corner under some windows.

And for some added drama(and hilarity), have this:

Art!

I've been up to artsy things again, more than usual.  Well, more like I'm getting the stuff to actually do art.  I took a glass fusing class that I've been wanting to take for about a year and a half, and am getting a small glass kiln on monday :)  I've also been buying some awesome fibers from people, mostly on etsy.  The yarn swift my friend is helping me make is almost finished, and my mom is letting me use her scale until I find one I like.  I upped my meds again, so hopefully soon I'll be able to leave the house on my own, so I'll be able to garden, and am going to learn how to can from a new friend.  And in about half an hour, my mom is dropping of my new used potter's wheel :D  So slowly but surely, I'm doing more and more.  I'm excited, and hopefully I'll be able to post some stuff in my newly renamed etsy shop, more appropriately named: ArtsyLittleThing.  It has nothing in it ... Yet.  Just wait.  I'll do things.  Many things.  Stuff I like to do.  *shifty eyes*

Meds, take two

Yeah, the internet sucks royally.  I wrote out everything all eloquently, but then it got deleted because of an outage.  So yeah, you now get the crazier, me trying to remember what I wrote, and typed up hastier version.
The meds that I wrote about last time worked for a while, but then I realized I was gaining an amazing amount of weight.  It was causing even worse, constant paralyzing panic attacks, and I didn't want anyone to see me, ever.  I was also changing my diet for the better and starting to work out in my home, so I should have at least been staying even for weight.  But no.  So the doctor gave me a new prescription, and everything would have been fine, except that it's expensive, so I freaked out over the price, and didn't get it for too long, and went without any meds for a while... It got really bad.  I finally just said that we had to, and gave up seeing the chiropractor to get them.
They seem to be working pretty good.  I've been feeling better, and am getting through the holidays with happy feelings.  It's nice.  I even got a camera for christmas (early) so I'll write about more cheerful things like presents and post pics soon.
I want to do stuff with people, but probably won't make the first contact for fear of, well, people.  Friends, and people who want to get to know me better, I'm not always this crazy, and I'm getting better, so I apologize for the crazy/ lack of communication.  But just initiate something, and I'll do it.
Your friend, even through the silence,
Jenny

Whistle While You Work

I've been cleaning.  And cooking.  And cleaning.  And drying herbs.  More cooking.  More cleaning.  Not just surface stuff, the deep stuff.  I'm also helping a friend build a yarn swift.  He's designing it and doing all the hard stuff, I'm helping where I can.  I wish I could do more, but what can I do?  Next is building custom shelves.  I'm changing lots of stuff up and moving furniture.  I'm even getting an elliptical that someone is getting rid of.  That will help with working out, so I'm happy.

Happiness Is...

All right.  After writing and deleting the first few sentences of this about five times, I'm deciding to open up and share something.  I have had a struggle for years with crippling depression and anxiety.  I have managed to finally get the depression part more or less under control, but that made the anxiety worse.  Much worse.  And opened the door to new problems.  But one thing at a time, right?  Anyway, I've been seeing someone, andI finally agreed to try some medication.  I have had bad luck (example: no bad, but no good emotions) with medications in the past, and that made me very nervous to try anything else.  Now I'm starting week five of my two new meds, and I think they may be working.  Others see it more than me, but that's a good thing, right?  So I'm redoubling my efforts to live.  I'm spinning more, spending some time outside, knitting again, finding more ways to actually enjoy things.  It sounds great on screen, but it's an ongoing process.  Side effects are worth living with, even though it will make getting to a healthier weight harder.  I already had issues with balance, so less balance is no biggie.  Things like that are worth more life to me.
Anyway, that's the big thing that has been going on in my life recently.  I hope it made sense.

On a more cheerful note, one thing I'm doing is actually trying out the whole 'selling' thing on Etsy.  Not much is on there, but I'm taking it slow, trying not to have a panic attack about doing this.  So yeah.  Maybe I'll even figure out how to add it to the side of the blog one day.  If you feel so inclined to check it out, my name is peanutbuster.

I hope you all have a great day, and enjoy it for what it is.